Rowing Camp And On The Road To Injury-Free Existence

It has been almost six months since I consciously decided to fix my long-term injuries. I’ve made huge gains, and learnt how to persist and when to back off when needed. 

A big turning point for me was rowing camp earlier this month. I was slow, in pain for many sessions and also very disorganized with equipment and time management. I thought I was wasting my time, at a rowing camp where I could only complete half the session before my back caved in. I told myself that all I had to do was get through camp, and when I left I could quit rowing forever. Sounds like a poor attitude but it was a great way to bargain with myself when morale was low and I wasn’t going to respond to blind positivity. Once I decided it would be ok to quit when I got back, I stopped caring about whether or not I would get injured and just did whatever I could – I aimed to get as much done as possible, and if I got injured, then hey, I could back out and pursue something else. Like a masters degree. Or a full-time job. Or travel. Funnily enough, as soon as I adopted this frame of mind I got a lot more work done and felt much faster. I was also very fortunate to be in a squad of awesome, supportive people – at the start of almost every session I would struggle to push the boat off the landing, or at the end bring it back, and without fail someone would run down from the boat park to help me, and once even a few jumped in the water and swam my boat, with me in it, to the landing. I think it also helped to realize that many others were struggling, perhaps not with injury but fatigue, illness or pressure to be on speed for team selection. The support of the other squad members made it impossible to feel any despair for long. And needless to say I did not quit when I got back to Melbourne.

My challenge now is to make sure I am getting enough training volume done without sending myself back to injury land. So far I have had a 100% success rate with saying no if I am considering the session ahead and dread how painful it will be on back/hamstrings. If I look at the work and imagine it to be great practice for a race, or worry about how I will do it with school crews stopping and starting on the wrong side of the river, then I know I should be fine. I also have a rough idea of how long my back will last before it fatigues, and it has been a huge help to see that 30 minutes of pain-free rowing has now become 60 min on a good day.

I still have off days. Today and yesterday for example, I had no qualms with replacing the session on the watt bike as I had pretty unsettling sharp nerve pain on Thursday evening’s row. While this was a clear sign that I should give things a break, I also would attribute an off day to stress and non-rowing things. The day before I had attended a free session with an alternative health professional that at the time seemed fairly harmless, but was told based on no scans and a very non-medical questionnaire (“how many raw vegetables do you eat a week?”) that I had two slip discs and a million other problems. After leaving I assured myself through building anxiety that this guy was making big claims to freak me out and attract a scared, attentive, paying client. For days I was still very frustrated and even feeling guilty that I had apparently ruined my back again after so much work. There seems to be a huge correlation between state of mind and injury progression - good days will almost always happen when I am seeing myself as resilient and capable. This was an invaluable lesson to stick to what works. I have an amazing chiropractor at the moment and other than massage it seems ideal for treatment to be as simple and straightforward as possible.

That is it from me! Hoping to post again with even more gains and a few happy race results. :) 

Watching many movies with cabin friends was amazing, especially re runs of such classics as Bridget Jones and Notting Hill.

Blister shots - this is my 10th year of rowing and I still get these things

Compliments from a Stranger v. Catcalling: A voice from a city that seems to get it

Catcalling on the street. A favourite of pop journalist opinion pieces, something that I’ve heard is a big deal in LA and New York, not something I’ve ever really needed to confront in Melbourne. My only firsthand experiences were being honked a few times when I was awkwardly around 13 years old waiting for public transport, and a few comments at rugby when fundraising for rowing in a zootie. As a 13 year old, I thought I must have been standing on the road or messed something loud on my outfit, and when fundraising I was delighted that a dude told me I had a nice rack when I was a pretty flat-chested and grumpy lightweight rower.

So what of street harassment? And is this a silly problem that is sucking oxygen away from more important gender issues? The recent video of actress walking through New York and being catcalled condemns without hesitation all who thought it was justified and welcome to let strangers know that they are looking at them and they want a piece of it. There is retaliation, mainly from men, that catcalling is a compliment and a bit of harmless flirtation on the part of the guy making a comment. Dating expert Steve Santigati even claims that a woman’s greatest desire in public is to be told they are pretty, so all of this complaining about catcalls is really to cover up a subconscious glee that dude X on the train wants to know what you’re doing tonight. I love being told by a stranger how I must be thinking, so cheers Steve for the psychoanalysis. My opinion of this all is really to stop using catcalls as an excuse to enforce the sexist status quo and get to know what is ok and not ok to say to a stranger in the street.

I often see guys out in public who I think are very attractive – often I wish I had walked up to them and said hello, or made a conversational comment about their clothes or what they’re reading. The few times I have mustered up the courage to talk to them, sometimes they have subtly added their girlfriend into the conversation topic or that they’re just not interested. I would deem it revolting for me to go up the man of interest and be like, “I was just looking at you over there and you look pretty hot. What are you doing tonight boy?” Even if you would love for someone to say this to you, one has to accept that for most, it’s pretty fucking creepy for a stranger to let you know that they’ve been watching you and thinking about having sex with you. Especially if you’re a woman, and most probably unable to defend themselves against a larger male (Though this fortunately was not the case when in Marseilles an approximately 90 year old man about two heads shorter than me and half my body weight joyously followed me back to my hostel, calling out “bonjour, bonjour” the whole way).

So my voice on all of the madness is this: I think it’s fun and exciting to meet people at any time or any place. It can be the most exhilarating part of your day to actually go up to someone who interests you in any way and try to have a connection. On the other hand, I DON’T think it is ok for someone to talk AT you and make it clear that your purpose in their life is for your image and you as an object to arouse them. 99% of the time, especially during the day, it is unacceptable and mean for one to go up to another have let them know that they are being seen in this way, when they’re trying to work or run errands. 

Want to give a genuine compliment to someone you see? Make conversation and assess whether their personality would welcome it. Some women would like it, some wouldn't. Would these guys in LA or NYC actually approach these women they catcall, look them in the eye and say hello properly? I like to say hello and smile at as many people as possible during the day. I also would love to have the confidence to go up to guys who interest me and get to know them, and vice versa have guys approach me to make friendly conversation. This subtle change in public interaction is a huge step for gender equality, and you never know, a genuine greeting to an attractive passerby could garner far greater results than “Nice ass sweetheart!”

To see Santigati's "mansplaining" of NY catcall video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HI4DC18wCg

Aeternum Fortis: Here's to Connor Dawes and fixing an 18-month backinjury once and for all

I wrote early this year about pain, what it means to me and how I’ve learnt to take it seriously. It brings me a lot of pain and frustration to say that it has been a year since I left rowing to improve my injuries, and I still often feel like I haven’t gone anywhere.

I could bore you with the convoluted, verbalized confusion I try to spindle out to doctors and therapists about my past injuries. None are bad enough to have surgery or severely remove me from a fulfilling life. So to make things clear and present-focused, here’s what I’m working with, and what I want to fix permanently:

1.     Back injuries: specifically a disc bulge between L4/L5 vertebrae…very very common, with pain symptoms depending on how much the bulging disc hits nerves nearby. I also am missing a disc in L5/S1, which puts more pressure on the already bulging L4/L5.

At the moment this means I completely avoid rowing, ergos or running. I can do low-intensity swims, watt bike, cycling and walking. I can do most weights exercises other than those that load up the lower back area. I have learnt over the past 12 months to prioritise strength over cardio when returning from injury.

2.     Shin Splints: a minor injury but a massive pest! These will come up with any running at all or a long bout of walking. I have had these since I was 16, I gave up a while ago on trying to fix them but I have decided to take up the challenge again. Many rowers enjoy running as cross training or as a substitute when they need to reduce volume on the water.

3.     Motivation: I’ve found it hard to believe that I could truly overcome these injuries to be a 100% functional rower and athlete again. With 18 months under my belt of dealing with a bad back, it’s easy to categorise yourself as someone whose body just can’t take rowing.

At Connor’s Run today I was so moved by Connor Dawes’ attitude to his illness, and what I took from his story as very fierce positivity right to the end. This has really pushed me to believe that with the right work and attitude, I can fix myself up and row again.

I would love to hear people’s opinions on what has worked for them, or what they know works for lumbar disc bulges and shin splints. Currently I do weights 2-3 times a week, which is a combination of core and resistance exercises. I either walk-run or bike or swim once a day. I have done this inconsistently for a few months, I do think for the sake of motivation, that I should practice some discipline and put in the effort to do it daily, ideally in the morning. I initially thought with shin splints that rest was the key, though I’m finding out now though that calf stretches and strength exercises are also essential – something to add to a daily warm up and warm down I think.

Aeternum Fortis, and thanks Connor for the push. Looking forward to the first time I can take the scull out for a light row.

For more information on Connor Dawes and the RCD fund, http://rcdfund.org/

Why Leo Should Have Pushed Kate off the Door: the Curse of the Oscarless Playboy

On the whole, it is better to deserve honours and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.
- Mark Twain's Notebook, 1902-1903

Leonardo Di Caprio might have this quote taped across his wall. For the first time ever, I might give my undivided attention to at least half an hour of the Oscars, so that I shall feel it its entirety the award scene of Best Actor in a Leading Role.

Leo, and/or his monolithic swarm of fans not unlike the crowds at White Night may be hitting their heads against the wall, Arnie Grape style, trying to fathom why his trophy cabinet is missing an Oscar. His IMBD page is a 1000+-word manifesto, begging why? Why? WHY?! behind each heady, manic accolade. “A high level of dramatic versatility”, “a generation’s definition of a heartthrob”, “continues to wow audiences by refusing to conform to any cliché”. It seems, that by acting in so many hot and classy blockbusters, a few token weird leftie movies and customary underprivileged upbringing, that this Renaissance man who is also an environmentalist and fluent in German, deserves an Oscar.

I realised, after watching Wolf of Wall Street in the cinemas, that in fact many movies I choose to venture outside for, feature “the heartthrob of a generation”. Peculiar. How has he become one of my favourites? A review of my own love for Leo uses “heaps of facial expressions”, “I like the characters”, “pretty” and “same birthday” as reasoning for keen approval. As I flick through websites and images of LDC, I pick up a few patterns - tendency to date models, an absurd amount of award nominations, with a sparse few won and a penchant for acting characters with tragic endings. What is Leo’s curse? An overview of his most well known characters clearly suggests bad omens, that can be split into three themes – #Wretchedness, #Unattainable Love and even a few #Diamonds. Observe:

Romeo and Juliet: Leo as Romeo falls in love with Juliet at a party. They get married behind their arch rivalled families. Romeo is banished, Juliet fakes a suicide, planning to awake 24 hours later and elope with Romeo. Romeo believes Juliet is dead and poisons himself. #unattainablelove #wretched

Titanic: Leo the roaming artist saves Rose the rich girl from committing suicide over her arranged marriage. Jack falls in love with Rose, Rose’s fiancé frames Jack with theft of his diamond necklace engagement present, and locks him up. Rose saves Jack, but Jack dies saving Rose at sea. #wretched #unattainablelove #diamonds

Blood Diamond: Leo the gunrunner and fisherman try to smuggle a diamond out of Africa. After several hours of bloody warfare, they succeed; reach the escape helicopter with diamond, but gunrunner dies just before the helicopter leaves. #wretched #unattainablelove #diamonds

Django Unchained: Leo the malicious Mississippi plantation owner is tricked into inviting bounty hunters home. He discovers their ploy to sell his slaves to them cheap, and insists on charging the full amount. He then demands a formal handshake with the bounty hunters but is shot through the heart instead. #wretched

The Great Gatsby: Leo as Gatsby the 1920s New York businessman whose party life is all to attract his ex love Daisy. He starts an affair with Daisy, she gives him up when she finds out he’s a crook, but he doesn’t lose faith…until he gets shot by a man who mistakes him for the driver (Daisy) that hit and killed his wife. Bad. Luck. #unattainablelove #wretched #diamonds

Even more…

#unattainablelove: The Beach, The Departed, J Edgar Hoover

#wretched: The Beach, What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, The Aviator, The Departed, J Edgar Hoover

With the irrefutable logic of correlation, I predict that the Wolf of Wall Street could finally draw the curtains on one long, soliloquy of Oscarless leader roles. For the first time Leo (as Jordan Belfort the “resourceful” stockbroker) does not die, the unattainable girl takes him AND he stays out of prison, giving the FBI and token #wretchedness the finger. If Leo wins an Oscar, it could relieve him of the tacky and un-Oscarly status as a “generation’s heartthrob”, and sweating fans will need to move on to another pretty actor’s plight to be taken seriously (cue Matthew McConaughey)? I hope that the man whose characters are fixated on diamonds, unattainable love and wretchedness will see the parallels in his own eternally hopeful, Oscarless state.

Christian Bale (as Batman) glares at me from my iPhone wallpaper. Matthew McConaughey seems like a great guy, I don’t know who the hell Bruce Dern is (Wikipedia points out that I vaguely recognize him, but this is cheating I didn’t know his name to start off), and I am quite pleased with myself that I could type out Chiwetel Ejiofor’s name on first glance from Google. I’m also looking forward to Jennifer Lawrence’s last-ditch attempt at self-deprecation, while awkwardly modelling Dior (here's your chance Leo!). I hope that twice-victor Tom Hanks, thrice-victor Daniel Day-Lewis and JLaw quietly high five and sit on their own table, while the rest of them in ad breaks will crawl down the red carpet, drugged, drooling and desperate to receive their well-deserved Oscar.